#Pain1

Mood Swing.

Aku sedih sampai tak boleh nak type apapun.
Fuck you.
Fuck you all.
Fuck everything.
Gonna take my ass out from this fucking asshole hell.
Bloody suck.

Crawling. Falling.

Hello guys x

I think this one might be a lil bit serious entry one. But I can't promise you because I'm afraid that at the end of this entry there must be some of lunatic line. So don't trust me if I said that kind of word again and again that just me trynna convince you. But seriously this sound so serious. Solemnly it is. Time flies so fast that you can't even imagine where were you at? What were you did before? You can't imagine. Can't even illustrate any of it. They all just passed through your life and your time. The memories faded away. The people we loved gone. The silhouette disappeared. But the pain will stay there eternally. Mostly the bedtime is the time we recall back everything that had happened in our life. Its not that what we wish for or urge or ask for, the memories kept haunting our mind. That is the time we feel the pain all over again. 

  We started to miss that person who used to be a very important person in our life once but then they just leave us eventually without any legit reason. Can you believe that? It's really happen in our life. In this world. People easily come and go. I don't know what's on their mind and what are they seeking for.  There's no solid answer that can be use in this circumstances. Hmm.

  For those people who had left me for a long time I beg you don't you dare turn up yourself for a second time. I don't need people like you anymore who are so ruthless, inhumanity, devilish or whatever. Just no. I would like to say that I am not that kind of people who gives a second chance. I am obviously not a person who easily gives you a second chance. But I forgive people easily. That is clearly I am. I can have someone who can replace every puzzle that I missed and I'm pretty sure they will not leaving thus there will be no more disquieting condition.

And by the time I'm writting this I. am. thinking. the suitable. title. to. put. on. 

I get goosebump whenever I listen to river flows in you by Yiruma or also known as Bella's Lullaby. 

A very romantic song. 

If you guys watch The Twilight movie series I guess you would recognize this song.

So so nice. And romance.

Quick update x

Don't leave.

Think, why you fell in love in the first place. Why you choose me. Think, how many memories that we both had created. If I'm not that important anymore...for you why did you still be with me? - Negative thoughts.

But not exactly happened in my real life. Absolutely no. Indubitably will not happened.
Over-thinking really do kill us slowly.

Ouh, by the way my result that I'm waiting for it such a long time are officially will be out on 20th of March. I'll make an entry when the time has come and after the time had passed. I bet my silent reader out there really wanna know about it. Yes you girlfriend(s) my silent reader. That shows a very typical of Malaysian judge someone by looking at someone level of cleverness. Actually its a nature of man which means fitrah manusia. Kau 10A+, kau pandai. Other than that, kau bodoh. To be quite frankly, we can't and we will not ever satisfy others.

Wait!

No.

I ain't going anywhere. Imma stay here. Yes, I was lied about the last entry that because I was being freaking emotional that time, like very emotional. So I was out of my bloody mind. Next time, I should take it easy, calm down and remind always remind myself that this is just a temporary feelings. See ya x

Nothing beats this kind of intimacy, when it's about 3am and it feels like you're the only two people in the world. There are no words or intentions, you're just happy lying next to each other knowing that you never want to do this with anyone else. Just to consider  that you're each, essentially, a bag of bones and organs and muscles, and yet you're both so much more than that because you've found each other and suddenly everything makes so much sense. - Via Tumblr

Oh guys,

Btw, my Tumblr's home look freaking interesting tonight and I'm like.."ahh I wanna reblog that shit, ahh this shit" That's currently my mood. Check out my Tumblr.

kynafaredreme.tumblr.com

Arrive x

Hello x

Actually I don't feel like to update the blog. But..I decide to tell someone through here. So here I am. And actually I don't feel like to talk with anyone. Damn this song in the blog wrong time for me to hear. But sokay. Fine, I'll take it. Take it the pain. Wait , Im not ready.

So....

Now the time has come for you and me..split. (My brain detected for some of suitable english language to use here). I can see that both of us can live very well without any trouble. We are like don't need each other again..anymore. Going to sleep. Going to forget everything. Going to delete all the memories. And I need my baby 'Golden Fish' sleepover at my place. See you guys around. Hopefully xoxo

Waking up I see that everything is OK
The first time in my life and now it's so great
Slowing down I look around and I am so amazed
I think about the little things that make life great

I wouldn't change a thing about it
This is the best feeling

This innocence is brilliant
I hope that it will stay
This moment is perfect
Please don't go away
I need you now
And I'll hold on to it
Don't you let it pass you by

I found a place so safe, not a single tear
The first time in my life and now it's so clear
Feel calm, I belong, I'm so happy here
It's so strong and now I let myself be sincere

It's a state of bliss, you think you're dreaming
It's the happiness inside that you're feeling
It's so beautiful it makes you wanna cry

Said I’d never leave her cause her hands fit like my t-shirt,
Tongue-tied over three words, cursed.
Running over thoughts that make my feet hurt,
Body's intertwined with her lips

Now she’s feeling so low since she went solo
Hole in the middle of my heart like a polo
And it’s no joke to me
So can we do it all over again?

If you’re pretending from the start like this,
With a tight grip, then my kiss
Can mend your broken heart
I might miss everything you said to me

And I can lend you broken parts
That might fit like this
And I will give you all my heart
So we can start it all over again

Can we take the same road two days in the same clothes?
And I know just what she’ll say if I can make all this pain go
Can we stop this for a minute?
You know, I can tell that your heart isn’t in it or with it

Tell me with your mind, body and spirit
I can make your tears fall down like the showers that are British
Whether we’re together or apart
We can both remove the masks and admit we regret it from the start

You’ll never know how to make it on your own
And you’ll never show weakness for letting go
I guess you’re still hurt if this seed's sown
But do you really want to be alone?

Hello x

Now everything means nothing. This blog is the only way people can reach me wanna read my story and wanna know about me..just 'if' they do read my blog. I've think a lot lately that I wanted to change my url but I will consider it later because initially this blog belong to my boyfriend. So I think how about no need to change everything in here just keep it original like before. Also my boyfriend's entry I didn't bother about it not even want to delete it and never ever cross my mind to delete all of his entry. Just let it be. See you guys around, xoxo

Shut up dear x

Hello x

I am wondering because there still some of bitches are bitching about people talk shit about people out there. Can you please stop this for a while? No, for forever. There's nothing else between you and me, show some respect. If you don't have a brain don't show it to public. If you not matured then don't show it off. Its not one of things that you should be proud to kid. I don't even want to start a war between us again. So please you don't need to drag my name along. Like Allah say buka aib orang di dunia, Allah buka aib kita di akhirat. Nauzubillah. I am trying really hard to not to humiliate people around me. That absolutely not my trait. If you are confusing , you can ask me that would be nice just you and me not including others. I don't wanna make it go wrong as it just a very tiny matter. Be polite, you're not even a slut at least you are :) xoxo

Worst x

Hello x

So how's everything today? Are you all okay? Fine? Good to hear so do I. Yesterday was so much different than other days. I felt so lazy to get up from the bed and decided to lay in my bed. Create some stories on my mind, thinking too much like a lot, bad thoughts, good thoughts, I could feel strange feeling that I ever felt before. Asking myself 'what is going on right now?'. I don't have an answer, but as always I'm comforting myself and keep saying that 'everything is fine darling'. Yesterday was the day I replay all the memories back then and bring it up to present, how much I've been hurt before this and how strong I am to face it. I can't believe that I can be strong like this..I just can't imagine how. I sometimes think that I can't function very well in future like I used to. Like I can't breath anymore, tired to live the life, tired to smile, tired to pretend..everything in this world get bored and tired. The whole me is dead. I'm too tired to continue this life. There so many problems when I grow up..What will happen when I'm 30?Holy shit. Xoxo

A man’s chest is a girl’s comfort zone.

It is a warm feeling when a girl is leaning her head through a guy’s chest. It is not just about lust or anything. But, it is way to comfort herself. There’s a sense of security when you just feel the lovely curves in his chest. It’s like listening to his heartbeat and feeling her breath beneath your hair. You’ll talk about happy things and you can fall asleep. It’s one of the best yet simple moments that you can cherish with the person that you love so much.-Via Tumblr

FEBRUARY.

How can time flies so fast? I thought that we're still in 2012 of December. However, there is no stupid effing speech when we reach new month. Like seriously? I'm here just to say hello February. May I ask you where the hell 31days gone? Okay should stop it. I will continue back my life like before..I am too busy to hate, too busy to give a damn, too busy to mocking people. xoxo